Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Flavours of India: Racism

Last evening, I was talking to this old friend. She is an Indian married to a extremely handsome and charming African-American. She was worried about her daughter's new school, where some of her classmates had problems about her ethnicity. Though both of us avoided mouthing that disgusting, troubling word, I knew exactly what she was talking about.


But wait a minute, racism is not just a disease in one part of the world, and it is not restrained to just one race of people. Oh yes, like the Six Hats training program at my first job, anyone can wear a Racist-hat any time. And in India we do it, in different ways. No surprises there. Our racist views and actions driven by them come cheap too, are you listening, you dollar-mongering world?

I remember a time when I was eight, and travelling in a bus when a frail, silver-bearded old man, with a white cap( indicating he was a Muslim) boarded the bus and no one offered him a seat. I could hear the word 'Mia' being said several times. I did not understand it back then, but later learnt that being a 'Mia' was a passport to being lynched in broad daylight, with the cops cheering. And by the way, it did happen.

We have different flavours of racism. The most easily recognisable, is the caste system, where a rag-picker and a bank-teller are people who, will never ever share a table. And the colour of your skin, your last name, the state you belong to, the religion you follow, and yes, the fact whether you are a meat-eater can all be stacked up against you, and dear Lord, you sure can be a victim of racism.

So if you are from the northern state of Bihar, you must have a lot of cattle at home and in your barn, if you are dark-skinned then you are a 'Madrasi', if you follow a non-vegetarian diet (eggs, not included) then you are a Brahmin, and if you are a non-vegetarian (eggs, included) then you must had had an inter-caste marriage. The list is endless.

Yes, India is a democratic country, you can live the way you want. But we still are very caught up in these flavours.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Paranoid and a mum

For the past five weeks my little one has had a combination of cold, severe chest congestion, fever and diarrhoea. In his numerous visits to the GP and my several, almost frantic calls to the Helath Service Direct Helpline, we have seen that the advice we are given is something that requires no medical prowess or the tough-medical school education. Sometimes the advice given, is as ridiculous as 'make him comfortable', or 'its a virus, but it will clear out on its own', or ' his body will eventually develop immunity to it' or 'it is common for all children these days'.


The general mentality here is that children cannot be referred to a paediatrician unless they have their spleens hanging out!


Last evening, adamant on getting a blood test done we took him to the GP, who though sympathetic and highly dramatic in his mannerisms, has asked on a couple of occasions of my educational background because I speak my mind on my son's condition. He suspects me to be a medical student who did not have enough passion to complete MBBS!! He very reluctantly wrote a prescription for a blood test but warned that there was nothing to be found in the blood, because on physical examination my son was perfectly ok! Wow!

He has now advised me to go for the blood test after two weeks. His argument is that  my son's case is not a solitary one, he says it's common for children who start nursery around this time of year, and for three months after they have started nursery to go through a 'coping with bacterium' or better still, 'building an immunity' phase. He further suggests the fact that my little one is up and about and partially recovers for a few days is a sign that his body is perfectly normal and he should definitely get better in some days.


While I completely appreciate his findings, as a mother, the devil's advocate in my mind is constantly nagging me with the question - What if the doctor is wrong? Just because every child who goes to nursery has similar pains, does that mean my son too has the same case? What if, it is not the case? For the moment, it's just a doctor's physical examination that indicates my son's so-called good health!! So what if, there are some serious underlying problems that are not been found? Am I being paraniod or just a mum?


My started his nursery a month ago. Since then he has attended nursery only for 12 days. The remaining days he was at home because the nursery does not accept children if they are a little 'unwell'. The word unwell means if his stools are a little loose, they call me and ask to collect him from the nursery. In the last two weeks, they have done this twice. Also they have a 24 to 48 hour policy, which means we cannot send him back for the next two days as well!

So in total we have paid two whole months' fees (which is approximately the amount that I will get if I sell my right kidney!) and we end up having to take care of him at home, taking time off from work. It makes me wonder if I should just become a homemaker, baking cup cakes?